Tuesday, October 25, 2005
Weather changes from time to time.
I juz wish my heart will.
But I know it cant.
How i wish i would juz let go of the past, and move wit my life.
How i juz wish that i would be reborn to a new life, and start all over again.
Evrytink has happened. So fast. It hurts. Yet it has already left.
Leaving me, struggling for air.
Why? How did this happen to me?? WHY did this happen to me?
Sometimes i feel like, im floating.. Oblivious to wat's going on around me, and always not wanting to know wat the hell is happening to me..
One moment im happy, and the next, i want to cry and juz give up.
I dont feel secure inside me. I feel like evrytink is breaking apart. I AM BREAKING APART! N i dont even want to know bout it coz i dont wanna care or think bout it. Why love someone who doesnt love u back? COZ I CANT HATE THEM. no matter how much i try to hate or forget someone, i juz cant.
One moment im sad, and the next, i juz want to be happy and put it all behind.
That's when i know, I cant.
All homosapienz i've met have told me to put it behind me. mOVE on wit ur life. I cant.
No one understands me. No one understands wat i've been through. No one understands why im behaving like this. No one will. Even I dont. Why should or would anione try to understand me when the closest homosapien to me dont too?
I juz wanna shut my eyes..
And go far away from this world.
Forget evrytink.
Letting go of evrytink.
I juz wanna shut the light out.
And juz be straddled in the darkness.
Forever.
I juz wanna shut myself out.
And juz forget that i've been alive for 18 long years.
It's raining. Thunders rolling. Numbness spreading.
N still, I am breathing.
7:58 AM
